Boxed booze with Beatbox Beverages is something we can all get behind

Full disclosure: we watch the ever-loving hell out of some Shark Tank. But we’ve never sought out any of the featured products to try in real life … until now. And wouldn’t you know it; we found Beatbox — a great big carton of easy-drinkin’ booze. The company raised a million buckaroonies on the popular show with an investment from the Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban, and is now on a mission to take the impressionable nation by fruit-flavored storm.

Here’s the deal: the red one tastes like cranberry Kool-Aid, the blue one is like a melted Otter Pop and the green one is dangerously close to just a normal, unspiked Gatorade. There’s almost no throat-sting from the alcohol, which can either be a needed blessing or a disguised disaster. As a drink that’s 11.1 percent alcohol with only 7 grams of sugar per serving (almost five times less than that of a whiskey/coke), the Beatbox boxed cocktails keeps a nice brain-fade going while going nowhere near the waistline. The enclosed bladder is a rugged bag indeed, good for nights out in the woods, extreme park days or bringing along on your non-existent yacht. It still won’t keep anyone from texting exes at 3 in the morning, however, so it’s not exactly perfect … yet.